Pablo Picasso said, “Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone.”
What’s interesting about this quote is Pablo Picasso had no will. Obviously, he was willing to die having left this major life area unattended. According to one recent survey, 68% of Americans don’t have a will.
On March of this year (2021) I posted a couple of weeks on the Butler Counseling & Consulting Facebook page about famous people who died with no will and the results.
Pablo Picasso died in 1973 at the age of 91, leaving behind a fortune in assets that included artwork, five homes, cash, gold and bonds. Because Picasso died intestate and left no will, it took six years to settle his estate at a cost of $30 million. His assets were eventually divided up among six heirs.
Procrastination affects all types of people and families across all socioeconomic levels. Procrastination is the action of delaying or postponing something. You might argue that sometimes delaying or postponing might be a good thing.
In this age of immediate gratification and attentions spans of 10 seconds or less, learning to wait might be considered a virtue. But the process of procrastination has more to do with “WHY” we delay or postpone something.
When we postpone or delay out of fear, anxiety, perfectionism, or avoidance, we create hardships for ourselves and for our friends and family. “It’s self-harm,” said Dr. Piers Steel, a professor of motivational psychology at the University of Calgary and the author of “The Procrastination Equation: How to Stop Putting Things Off and Start Getting Stuff Done.”
One major difference between procrastination and simply waiting is this: procrastination has no end date and simply waiting has a trigger point of turning towards completion. A problem here is when simply waiting becomes the justification for our procrastination.
Let me explain. Simply waiting carries a named or un-named belief that “I will get that done when…” We often justify our procrastination with the idea of “getting around to it” or “one day” as simply waiting. The implication is that the item of our avoidance will get done.
Other justifications for procrastination could be, “it costs too much and I can’t afford that right now; I don’t have time; or it’s on my list.”
Procrastination based in negative emotions is a defense mechanism undergirded by the belief that doing the thing we’re avoiding will cause us harm in some way. Many people feel that if they focus in any way on death or end of life issues they will actually cause death to happen or the very least, cause a lot of pain. This line of thought focuses on ourselves in a negative way and promotes an unhealthy self-image of “I’m not enough; I’m not good enough; or I have nothing of value.”
Sadly, the opposite is what’s real and true. We all have value to those who love us. We are all extremely important to someone. Even dysfunctional families have a story to tell that could shed light on why some bad things have happened in the family. Telling those stories could provide the healing and restoration to move a loved one forward on their journey or telling those stories could release long held anger, resentment, or anxiety and finally bring peace.
The Guardian’s Gift is a place to let go of procrastination and finally tell the story, your story. We here at The Guardian’s Gift want to help you move past your procrastination so that you can create a legacy to be proud of, a legacy your family will cherish. Sometimes, we need someone to help us, to guide us, to move along with us.
We will prompt you with questions that gently lead you through your life and help you put everything together in a beautiful life legacy book. We will encourage you to make the steps that will move you through completion of, and organizing a legacy plan that is not painful and demonstrates your love and value to those most important to you.
We can even help you tell those difficult stories that promote healing and family restoration. Procrastination might be self-harm, but procrastination of planning for your legacy is most definitely harmful to your family.
You don’t have to be like the 68% of Americans or the Pablo Picassos of the world who die each year leaving major life areas unattended and undone. Don’t let this happen to you or your family! Let us at The Guardian’s Gift guide you through the process and prevent crisis and confusion.
You might be a procrastinator if ………. but you don’t have to be.
“You may delay, but time will not.” – Benjamin Franklin
~Dr. Judy H. Butler, PsyD
