I was chatting with my husband about my frustration with explaining what The Guardian’s Gift Time Capsule is to people hearing about it for the first time. When I tell people I’m a legacy coach and assist individuals and families with legacy estate plans I’m often told, “Oh, I already have a will.” Sometimes people say, “I know what to do, I took care of my Mom, (Dad, grandparent, aunt, uncle, friend).
The Guardian’s Gift is like a primary care physician in the medical field. Patients often consult specialized doctors, but they also need a primary care physician to coordinate and oversee their comprehensive care. This ensures that all aspects of their health are managed in an integrated manner.
“The Guardian’s Gift is similar to a primary care physician in that we provide referrals for various aspects of life that require decisions and actions. We refer people who need assistance with financial decisions, legal advice, funeral/celebration of life services, caregiving, and other important life choices.” But then we bring all the various parts together in one cohesive and manageable package.
The Guardian’s Gift is the hub of your legacy estate wheel with each spoke a different part of your life. We help people consider answers to questions they had not considered before and then consider the questions differently allowing for more optional solutions to become apparent. Being able to see the interaction and integration of the various parts through a different lens makes for better, smarter choices and decisions.
“The Guardian’s Gift serves as the central anchor of your legacy estate. Each facet represents a distinct aspect of your life, creating a comprehensive and interconnected whole. Our role is to guide individuals in exploring new perspectives and uncovering unconventional solutions to questions they may have overlooked. By encouraging a shift in thinking, we aim to reveal a broader range of options and possibilities.”
Many people have told me, “I never thought of that” or “I never thought of it quite that way.” When all the components of your legacy estate are properly maintained and connected to the driving force, the wheel turns smoothly. At some point, someone else will take control, and if all the components are not well maintained and as strong as possible, a wreck is likely to occur and injure the closest people.
When transitioning responsibility to others, any neglected or weakened elements could lead to significant disruptions, potentially jeopardizing the well-being of your loved ones. Ensuring every aspect of your legacy estate is meticulously managed and aligned with your core values is crucial for seamless operations.
There is so much information on the internet these days, that there really is no reason for anyone to not know something. I believe people are generally more knowledgeable than ever about a variety of things. But this also creates a false sense of “being smart”…and also leads to a false sense of intelligence.
In general, as humans, we possess a wide range of knowledge, but much of it is only surface-level. I often find myself saying, “I know just enough about that (whatever that is) to be dangerous.” To illustrate, I have a basic understanding of computer programs, but not enough to be truly proficient. When I attempt to make changes or adjustments, I often end up causing issues that require the expertise of a professional. This results in wasted time, extra expenses, and a great deal of frustration.
When I get caught in the trap of thinking I know more about a specific topic than I actually do, it always costs me. Always! I learned those lessons the hard way on numerous occasions. The lesson that caused this blog and the creation of The Guardian’s Gift was the lesson that I learned when my father began declining through dementia and eventually passed in December 2018.
Did you know there are over 400 different types of dementia? There are many similarities, but there are also some important major differences. According to AgeSpace, “Most people diagnosed with dementia have one of 4 common types: Alzheimer’s Disease, Vascular Dementia, Frontotemporal Dementia and Dementia with Lewy Bodies. These types of dementia have slightly different symptoms and causes.”
Reliable information about dementia from good resources can be found on these websites:
You might ask how this cost me. INSIGHTS Earlier treatment, better care for my dad, more patience through understanding, and healthier grieving for the losses. I thought I understood a lot more than I did and it cost me valuable time with my dad that I will never get back.
Thinking I knew more than I did because my parents had some legal documents cost me. [INISGHTS] Having legal documents did nothing to help me with the decisions of his care while he was alive. The legal documents were for after he died. I wish I had known more about resources and other caregiving options while he was living.
Listen, I’m a very intelligent woman. I have enough degrees to paper a whole wall in my office. I’m not bragging, it’s just a fact that I like learning and knowing stuff. I’m also a fairly “street smart” and practical woman. But I have learned INSIGHTS that every person, every case, every situation is different. Yes, there are similarities enough to ease a path but there are enough differences that they can be costly if not accounted for.
I haven’t even talked about the financial expense and aggravation factor of thinking we’re smarter than we are. That’s for another blog. Here are my TIPS for you today:
- Be humble enough to ask for help.
- Recognize that Google or WebMD are great resources but do not replace an expert’s experience.
- Seek experts who willingly refer you to other experts outside of their field.
- Don’t be lulled into the belief that because there are some legal documents in place you have an estate plan.
Caregiving, Aging-in-Place, End-of-Life decisions, and all the specialty areas of growing older are constantly changing and can be overwhelming. Be careful believing that what your parents had in place is the only and best way for you to plan. Don’t get caught in the intelligence trap where you or your loved ones end up paying a huge price.
